Three weeks ago, I saved two inspiration pictures to my phone and took a deep breath. Two hours, seven inches, and thirty screams later, I was on my way home with a rock star haircut and the overwhelming urge to tell every guy in my address book, "Can't touch this." It was a triumphant moment.

Since then, there has been no end to the bouquets of compliments being tossed at my feet. I can't step foot at the office or in any local store without bumping into someone I know who wants to tell me how fabulous my hair looks. I imagine this is the kind of attention people want when they say they'd like to become a celebrity, and I will go ahead and attest to the fact that it is usually pretty great.

Usually.

Of course, this is where I tell you the downsides of looking fabulous, and you shove a knitting needle in my arm. Ready? Go!

Downside #1: I daily run the risk of looking like a frump in comparison to my hair. Gone are the days of rolling out of bed and not caring about my outfit or my accessories. If I don't hit just the right combination of make-up, jewelry, and clothing, I look like the misshapen twin of Justin Bieber and/or a butch lesbian. I worry that this will scare away Elijah Wood one day.

Downside #2: I look great as a cat. This isn't actually a downside. I love it.

Downside #3: The ongoing stream of compliments is coming from people who otherwise never talk to me, which inevitably leads to an ongoing stream of small talk about hair. As with most small talk, it is borderline inane at best and downright maddening at worst. What made me cut my hair? Do I enjoy not using as much shampoo? Is it nice to be able to get ready faster in the morning? Has anyone made fun of me for having short hair yet? Let's launch into a lengthy discussion about hair products, hair styles, and the inability of Americans to find satisfaction with anything (including hair)! Hair is the only thing we have in common!

Downside #4: Attention! As an introvert, I am absolutely blown away by all the attention that is suddenly given to me, my opinions, my habits, my likes and dislikes, and — gasp — my appearance. I have plenty of experience stealing the spotlight with my wit and intellect, but I have no idea how to handle having the spotlight thrown at me — in the grocery store, at church, in the office, at Hobby Lobby, et cetera. Blush blush blush. I can no longer stand unnoticed in the corner and stare poetically at the thriving socialites around me. THEY ARE IN MY CORNER. REPEAT: THEY ARE IN MY CORNER. Send help.

Downside #5: Justin Bieber.

I promise that I won't bore you with another hair-centric post for at least a year, but I needed to get that out of my system. Also, people who see me weekly and still feel compelled to ask IF I cut my hair, CHOKE ON A SPORK. Just kidding. Let's hug it out. With sporks.

A month ago today, I celebrated my 25th birthday. As many people pointed out, I now have the option of stating my age as "one-quarter of a century," which is thrilling for all of ten minutes and then absolutely, gut-wrenchingly terrifying. The prospect of old age is super scary once you acknowledge that senior citizens are pretty much decomposing in front of your very eyes. Goodbye, skin cells! Farewell, liver cells! It was nice knowing you, Mr. Ashy McAsherson, who is now blowing away in the wind!

That said, I would like to extend my heartfelt thanks to Adam, Sean, Nick, gRegor, Jeremiah, Erica, Erini, Zach, and Pimp for making Skirtsapalooza a refreshingly youthful time. No old-people complaints were registered about the cupcakes ("Thank you, deary, but I'm not eating sugar this week!"), during the long walks between destinations ("My knees are broken!"), or after I dreamt up the scandalous idea to sneak Play-Doh into the movie theater ("Trix are for kids!"). In fact, y'all managed to give me twelve straight hours of childlike joy and merriment, and for that, you deserve another round of cupcakes. And bacon. And bacon cupcakes.

In the meantime, please enjoy this bulletproof list of key thoughts I've had since my birthday:

1. Trying new video games is tedious. I am content to play The Sims and Mario Kart exclusively for the rest of my life.
2. I have officially been playing piano for 80% of my life. There is very little chance that I will be able to say the same thing about being married. How oddly depressing.
3. Life is too short. I should drink more chocolate cake shakes from Portillo's.
4. In case of a quarter-life crisis, I can now rent a getaway car / escape pod.
5. That Paramore song is really catchy.
6. There is no time like the present to be SUPER FABULOUS.
7. I sincerely hope that John Stamos' new role in Glee will bring about a surge of activity at WWUJD.com.

Team Pop was formed during the family reunion of 2009, and its founding members including myself and three of my favorite cousins—Sandra (18), Natalie (15), and Jenna (13). We've always been close, in spite of our age differences, and we are practically inseparable at these bi-annual* shindigs. Our group's name was inspired by our official movie, Music and Lyrics, which we must always watch while dancing like fools and eating Bugles from Wal*mart. These are sacred and beloved traditions.

Of course, enjoying these things at one, lone family reunion would not make them true traditions, so Team Pop cleverly planned a get-together for August 2010. Sandra was going to be moving to Chicago as an adorable college freshman anyway, so we decided to assemble our awesome selves at my [parents'] house for a week of shopping and board games and sugar cookies and Twilight (hey, I make sacrifices for the team sometimes) and neon hair extensions and pedicures. We created a slightly more aggressive version of Chutes and Ladders to play while we listened to the music video for "Pop! Goes My Heart" on an endless loop. Greater times have never been had.

The plan was to end the story there and to wrap up with some high praise about my birthday bash and my dad's birthday bash and blah blah. But I realized some things about myself while the lovely girls of Team Pop were in town, and I need to get them out in the open before I forget.

• I like shopping way too much, and I'm really good at it.
• I've always been jealous of girls with Ugg boots, even though I find most Ugg boots to be really unflattering.
• My favorite colors have always been and will always be pink, purple, and turquoise.
• I get a kick out of giant sunglasses, giant rings, and most other giant accessories.
• I sing along with Miley Cyrus and Never Shout Never and Fall Out Boy at the top of my lungs in my car.
• I am a girly-girl.

Silly confessions, I know, but two months ago, I would have been ashamed to share those things. Sandra and Natalie and Jenna are all fabulously proud of who they are, as they should be, and while I've been that kind of girl before, I somehow let my personality get trampled over the past year or two. I was trying to fit into some sort of stereotype, and I was uncomfortable doing or liking anything unexpected. Well, poo on that. I still love burping and video games and baseball and big band jazz and talking about stabbing people, but I'm going to go ahead and interrupt this Mario Kart tournament to croon over my new scarf. Or maybe I won't! Either way, we'll both agree to be pleasantly surprised, right? Awesome.