Ferocious, meow meow, HELLO, SUNSHINE!

Those are the words I left in WriteMonkey on my personal desktop as a fullscreen reminder to myself to BLOG, BLOG, BLOG when I got home. "Rachelskirts? Blogging two days in a row? What black magic is this?" you might ask. It's NaBloPoMo, which is not so much magic as it is a curse. (Of course, if you really like reading blogs in November, I suppose it would be pretty magical.)

Point is, I'm participating in NaBloPoMo again this year, and I have teeny tiny hopes that I might actually make it all the way through this time. I have also chosen November 1 as the day I start the 30 Day Shred and November 6 as the day I participate in my very first 5K (walking, not running). Also also, I am re-reading Gretchen Rubin's The Happiness Project and am trying to tackle the first challenge—energy—by going to bed early.

This seems like a really bizarre time of the year to take on all these projects (did I mention that I'm also knitting a scarf for my Grandma? for Thanksgiving? and that my lack of talent for this craft has already made me cry?), and normally I'd blame this lapse in sanity on the end-of-October sugar rush. But shock of all shocks, I didn't eat a single piece of Halloween candy this year. GAH. Anyway, I'm not really looking at this as the start of any long-term changes in my life. Instead, I'm taking my New Year's resolutions for a test-drive before I fully commit in January, the proper month to change one's life for the better.

In conclusion, I would very much welcome ice packs, kittens, or encouraging postcards this month. What will I offer you in return? Mediocre blog posts and/or pictures of my cat.*

*If that doesn't float your boat, leave a comment with a [tasteful] suggestion of what else I could give you in return for your kindness this month.

Three weeks ago, I saved two inspiration pictures to my phone and took a deep breath. Two hours, seven inches, and thirty screams later, I was on my way home with a rock star haircut and the overwhelming urge to tell every guy in my address book, "Can't touch this." It was a triumphant moment.

Since then, there has been no end to the bouquets of compliments being tossed at my feet. I can't step foot at the office or in any local store without bumping into someone I know who wants to tell me how fabulous my hair looks. I imagine this is the kind of attention people want when they say they'd like to become a celebrity, and I will go ahead and attest to the fact that it is usually pretty great.

Usually.

Of course, this is where I tell you the downsides of looking fabulous, and you shove a knitting needle in my arm. Ready? Go!

Downside #1: I daily run the risk of looking like a frump in comparison to my hair. Gone are the days of rolling out of bed and not caring about my outfit or my accessories. If I don't hit just the right combination of make-up, jewelry, and clothing, I look like the misshapen twin of Justin Bieber and/or a butch lesbian. I worry that this will scare away Elijah Wood one day.

Downside #2: I look great as a cat. This isn't actually a downside. I love it.

Downside #3: The ongoing stream of compliments is coming from people who otherwise never talk to me, which inevitably leads to an ongoing stream of small talk about hair. As with most small talk, it is borderline inane at best and downright maddening at worst. What made me cut my hair? Do I enjoy not using as much shampoo? Is it nice to be able to get ready faster in the morning? Has anyone made fun of me for having short hair yet? Let's launch into a lengthy discussion about hair products, hair styles, and the inability of Americans to find satisfaction with anything (including hair)! Hair is the only thing we have in common!

Downside #4: Attention! As an introvert, I am absolutely blown away by all the attention that is suddenly given to me, my opinions, my habits, my likes and dislikes, and — gasp — my appearance. I have plenty of experience stealing the spotlight with my wit and intellect, but I have no idea how to handle having the spotlight thrown at me — in the grocery store, at church, in the office, at Hobby Lobby, et cetera. Blush blush blush. I can no longer stand unnoticed in the corner and stare poetically at the thriving socialites around me. THEY ARE IN MY CORNER. REPEAT: THEY ARE IN MY CORNER. Send help.

Downside #5: Justin Bieber.

I promise that I won't bore you with another hair-centric post for at least a year, but I needed to get that out of my system. Also, people who see me weekly and still feel compelled to ask IF I cut my hair, CHOKE ON A SPORK. Just kidding. Let's hug it out. With sporks.

A month ago today, I celebrated my 25th birthday. As many people pointed out, I now have the option of stating my age as "one-quarter of a century," which is thrilling for all of ten minutes and then absolutely, gut-wrenchingly terrifying. The prospect of old age is super scary once you acknowledge that senior citizens are pretty much decomposing in front of your very eyes. Goodbye, skin cells! Farewell, liver cells! It was nice knowing you, Mr. Ashy McAsherson, who is now blowing away in the wind!

That said, I would like to extend my heartfelt thanks to Adam, Sean, Nick, gRegor, Jeremiah, Erica, Erini, Zach, and Pimp for making Skirtsapalooza a refreshingly youthful time. No old-people complaints were registered about the cupcakes ("Thank you, deary, but I'm not eating sugar this week!"), during the long walks between destinations ("My knees are broken!"), or after I dreamt up the scandalous idea to sneak Play-Doh into the movie theater ("Trix are for kids!"). In fact, y'all managed to give me twelve straight hours of childlike joy and merriment, and for that, you deserve another round of cupcakes. And bacon. And bacon cupcakes.

In the meantime, please enjoy this bulletproof list of key thoughts I've had since my birthday:

1. Trying new video games is tedious. I am content to play The Sims and Mario Kart exclusively for the rest of my life.
2. I have officially been playing piano for 80% of my life. There is very little chance that I will be able to say the same thing about being married. How oddly depressing.
3. Life is too short. I should drink more chocolate cake shakes from Portillo's.
4. In case of a quarter-life crisis, I can now rent a getaway car / escape pod.
5. That Paramore song is really catchy.
6. There is no time like the present to be SUPER FABULOUS.
7. I sincerely hope that John Stamos' new role in Glee will bring about a surge of activity at WWUJD.com.