My father is the ultimate representation of Captain Obvious (or "Obviousman" in the Non Sequitur comic strip) in this day and age. Because of this, I grew up responding to a lot of my friends by sneering, "Thank you, Captain Obvious. Is your cape in the laundry today?" or equally snotty variations of the same.

Tonight, my dad was at it again. Actually, this is typical of almost every conversation I have with him.

Dad: "Hey, so your mom and I are on our way home."
Me: "Alright. You're bringing home dinner, right?"
Dad: "Yup. Have the pets been fed?"
Me: "Nope."
Dad: "Could you do that for us? Feed the pets?"
Me: "Yeah, no problem."
Dad: "Don't forget to feed the dog, too."
Me: "Yup. He's a pet."
Dad: "And don't forget to let him out after he eats."
Me: ". . . You mean, just like the past thirteen years?"
Dad: "Yeah, well . . . I just thought you might think he was too old to be let outside or something."

Oy. I'm surprised there isn't a dent in my forehead from all the times I've either thwacked it against my hand or my desk. Speaking of which . . . Daddy, I love you, but I'm going to have to tattoo "NO DUH" on your forehead while you're sleeping tonight.