Give Me Liberty and a Free Mocha

I could dedicate a whole chapter of my autobiography to all the times I've been foiled by the "we look like a Starbucks and serve Starbucks products and pay our employees from the Starbucks funds, but we sure as heck won't accept your Starbucks gift card, coupon, or other money-saving token" routine.

I AM AN AMERICAN. GIVE ME MY FREE STUFF ALREADY.